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The funny thing about life is that things are often not what they seem. We build up these grand expectations about them and then we realize that the shiny toy is maybe not so shiny at all. Expectation is a slippery slope. It can make us ignore our intuition and get caught up in our personal mythology. People can't actually know what we want from them if we don't speak it out loud. Things can't always unfold the way we'd like them to because we aren't the only ones in charge of reality.
I hear people often say that they have no regrets. I think that's pretty impressive, really. I surely have regrets. I think a life worth living almost always results in at least a few regrets. Living out loud means making choices that might not always end up the way we'd like them to. I think we all sometimes say something we didn't mean or forget to say something we did or opt for that shiny thing even when something in our gut tells us it might not be wise.
It's part of the deal. We will, if we march boldly ahead, make a few unfortunate turns and we will, if we live passionately, make a mistake or two. Yes, it's a dichotomy. There are no mistakes, but there are choices and consequences and some of the consequences are rather unpleasant. So perhaps we might call them mistakes, for lack of a better word? Those mistakes or consequences are opportunities and we can grow from them, learn from them and most importantly use them as a way to fine tune the practice of unconditional love. Practicing love for ourselves and love for those we encounter, especially those whom we don't much like.
We just keep making our way here through the wilderness and if we use our heart as our compass and our intellect to tender some of the intensity of the heart, we will at the very least end up having a most interesting journey.
I'm feeling introspective today. It is fall and this is what happens to me as winter starts lurking around the edges of my reality. I'm making huge changes and they're not going to make everyone happy. I'm probably going to step on a few toes without meaning to and I'm not quite sure how to prevent that. My entire reality and the entire fabric of my family's reality is shifting, and it is a huge thing. I have to hold on to the power of serendipity and the knowledge that no matter what choices I make, no matter where we end up, as long as I maintain the compassionate heart, all will be fine.
"My religion is kindness." The 14th Dalai Lama
"There is no such thing as a problem without a gift for you in its hands. We seek problems because we need their gifts." Richard Bach Illusions
“There are no mistakes. The events we bring upon ourselves, no matter how unpleasant, are necessary in order to learn what we need to learn; whatever steps we take, they're necessary to reach the places we've chosen to go.” Richard Bach The Bridge Across Forever